CHAPTER 62
Xavier’s POV
A scream pierces the air, jerking me from my dreamland as I jump out of bed.
My gaze darts to Jasmine on the other side of the bed, looking all around and I rush over to her, wrapping an arm around her as I caress her cheeks until her eyes lock on mine.
Perhaps it was a nightmare.
A nightmare is the only thing that can have her screaming her lungs off by this time.
Suddenly, curiosity hits me, making me wonder if this nightmare is a regular thing. We barely share a bed and I can’t tell if this is the first time this is happening or not.
When I am sure that she is calmer, I ask. “Are you ok now?”
She is far from ok. She doesn’t look ok to me but I wait for her to respond, the sudden urge to take her trembling lips hitting me.
Mentally slapping myself to take control of my fucking emotions, I stare right back at her. Her looks are unwavering, filled with something I can’t place.
Lust? Longing?
I guess this is exactly how I feel and not how she feels but the last thing she did last night has me questioning if this is mutual or one-sided.
She kissed me.
I started this. I was the one person who kissed her. I didn’t mean to. I did it probably because I wanted to or perhaps, it was because I wanted to shut her up when she was arguing back and forth with me.
That was the night she found Vicenzo in that torture room.
Since that night, there seems to be no turning back. I always want to kiss her.
I kissed her again and again.
But the other day at the club, she initiated it and last night too and it is fucking messing with my head.
“Did…did.. we…”, she stutters, creeps of blush evading her expression as her lips continue to tremble increasing my urge to take them.
I furrow my brows in confusion.Nôvel/Dr(a)ma.Org - Content owner.
Then it hits me as soon as she stares down at her changed clothes and stutters again. “Did…we?”
She has already changed into her nightwear. She passed out and is probably confused about how she got changed and why we are in bed together.
That isn’t all.
She is asking if we did it.
Laughter fills my insides when I realize what she is asking but I try so hard to contain it as I drop my hands away from her cheeks and stare down with a smile on my face.
I shake my head.
“Xavier”, she calls again, this time more desperate to know what happened between us over the night. I look up ready to keep up the show and continue watching her embarrassed face which looks more cute than ever before. “Did we do it? Did something happen between us?”
She finally manages to ask as dread skates her expression. Her eyes are widened and she is stiff, waiting silently for an answer.
I do not answer.
I keep a straight face until she taps me.
“Xavier”, she cries out before facepalming herself.
Unconsciously, the laughter I have been trying so hard to contain leaves my mouth, startling her. She watches me with dread then drags open the blanket and lets out another scream.
“Hey, come on”, I hold her two shoulders but she doesn’t look at me. “You kissed me again, remember?”
She shut her eyes and shook her head. I don’t know what that is for. Maybe she is shaking her head to let me know she doesn’t remember a thing.
A sober Jasmine would never have the courage to do such a thing. I knew the alcohol in front of her was at fault, just like how it was responsible for her actions at the club too.
She was too drunk. She dragged me into the ladies and crashed her lips to me. Anytime my mind reels back to that moment, I always feel a boner and the urge to kiss her again and again and again.
I don’t think I can ever get tired of kissing her soft lips. They taste like berries. She smells nice too and the feel of her soft body on mine, especially the breast always has me losing my mind and throwing caution to the winds.
Just like last night when she lost it. I almost did too.
She kissed me like her life depended on it and she single-handedly took her clothes and mine off, making me lose control for a minute and ready to claim her as mine.
“I’m sorry”, she cries softly, avoiding making eye contact with me.
I nod gingerly like someone who truly deserves the apology, even though I am amused.
Amusement is an understatement.
I want to laugh out loud again at the look on her face. She looks like someone who would pass out soon if I didn’t tell her what exactly happened.
“I…I…” I place a finger on her lips, feeling the softness.
“Be calm. You have nothing to be scared of or worry about, okay?” She nods, still avoiding my gaze. “Remember I told you I love…”
Suddenly, she jumps out of bed, cutting me short. “Can you excuse me, please? I need to take a bath. I know I made a mistake initiating a kiss last night but I never meant for it to get to… I’m genuinely sorry. This isn’t right. This isn’t supposed to happen and I promise it won’t repeat itself.”
What exactly is this woman thinking? Am I giving her the impression that something else apart from the kiss happened between us?
Did she also forget the question I asked her about staying?
I sit still in confusion, wondering what must be going through her mind.
“Can I tell you a lie?” I ask out of the blue, surprising myself too.
She looks up, interlocking her eyes with mine eventually.
“A lie?” she demands with creased brows.
“Yes”, I nod at her, leaning backwards with my two hands on the bed.
I am in nothing but shorts and this is enough reason to assume we truly did it.
“Come sit”, I tap my right hand on the bed where she was initially sitting before dashing away.
She keeps quiet but continues to watch me carefully, perhaps to figure out what I have in mind.
The silence continues for another minute before she shakes her head but I don’t give her a chance to say no before rushing over to her and grabbing her waist, earning a low gasp from her.
“You want a lie obviously. Should we tell each other lies?” my forehead hits her gently, our noses almost touching and my hand caressing her stiff waist.
“What…what… do you mean, Xavier?” she questions softly, more like a whisper which makes me shut my eyes to enjoy the moment.
“I hate you”, I suddenly blurt out the moment I open my eyes to meet her intense gaze.
She looks shocked for a moment but it disappears immediately.
“That’s a lie so you too tell me one lie about you or how you feel”, I say to her, moving in a circular motion with my two hands still on her waist.
She looks at me for a second completely clueless about what I am doing or what I mean. When it dawns on her, a smile creeps to her face and it does on mine too.
“I hate you too.”
Something stirs inside of me at the sound of that.
“I don’t want you anywhere close to me”, I add, still moving.
“I don’t want to have anything to do with you.”
“I don’t want to protect you with my life.”
“I don’t want you to protect me.”
Silence falls.
What more lies? What more can I say? What else do I want to say to reveal how I truly feel?
Am I abnormal, confessing how I feel through a lie? Is this because I am too scared to admit what I truly feel?
“I….”, she trails off, the blushes coming back to her expression. When she doesn’t say a word anymore, I decide to talk about what she is thinking.
“We had sex”, I say and her eyes bulge wide open as she halts our steps and moves away.
I smile and add. “That was also a lie.”
Relief floods through her as her shoulders sag.
“Another lie is that I don’t want to kiss you right now and every single day of my life”, I mutter, grabbing her back in position again and wanting to take her lips when a sharp knock comes to the door.
We disengage. My serious mood set back as I turn to the door in displeasure at the interruption.
It is just as if that other part of me which was acting all lovey-dovey with a woman I got married to has been cut off.
Before I know it, Jasmine dashes to the bathroom and I go to the door, and throw it open to see Ethan by the door.
I close the door behind me, knowing this must be important when I see someone else behind him.
Nicholas Moore.
Then it hits me.
He called me last night but I didn’t pick up. Now he is here this morning and that means one thing.
Andre is back home.