Chapter 18
Benson sat there thinking about the entire day as Alita walked away. He knew Alita was furious with him for choosing pussy over Julie, and he needed a method to prove her that he was a better guy than she thought, so he texted her shortly after midnight.
He started typing but couldn’t think of anything to write, so he went back to deciding whether to stay awake with Julie or sleep off.
To keep himself awake, he rose up and walked about the room. The ceiling, the wall, and the bed all caught his attention. He took a deep breath in and out. Something about the smell, the paint, the hospital ceiling, and his struggle to stay awake transported him back to when he was around eight years old and his sister, his only sister, became ill and he was asked to look after her while his mother went to see the doctor in his office after a nurse informed her that the doctor wanted to see her.Original content from NôvelDrama.Org.
“Take care of her till I return,” his mother urged him just before she departed. “Don’t look away from her, Ben,” he said, and she kissed his cheek before following the nurse out the door.
He just had one job, which he did for a short time till he fell asleep.
His mother’s shouts jolted him awake, and he quickly realized what had happened. He hadn’t thought about his sister in a long time. He couldn’t help but wonder if she would still be alive if he had stayed awake.
He wouldn’t allow himself sleep on Julie because of this. He didn’t want to sleep since he blamed himself for his sister’s death.
He walked back to the bed and sat down next to Julie when he stopped walking back and forth. While observing Julie, he wiped the teardrops from under his droopy eyes.
While he sat there, a wave of recollections about his sister washed over him. He recalled how they used to play in the sand in their garden as children. Because his brother had not yet been born, it was only the two of them at the time.
Benson despises being sad. He’d had far too many terrible experiences, and whenever he allowed himself to be sad, all of those memories were jumbled up and replayed in his mind. He’d recall far too much and inflict far too much sorrow on his heart. That’s why he did stuff to occupy his mind and keep his thoughts occupied so he wouldn’t walk down memory lane and climb back up dejected and depressed. He’d have to find a way out now. He frequently sought solace in the form of booze or sex, or he simply went for a drive around the city to clear his head.
When he went out with people in such state, he typically screamed and spoke carelessly. This depicted him as nasty and spoiled, although he was never a pampered child; he grew up in poverty, which aided him in his rise to the top. He knew he was dumping his baggage on people, but he wouldn’t stop because a few rants at people made him feel better and more powerful.
When Benson felt sad, he was either impolite, intoxicated, or lusty. In whatever state he’d shuffled up from his core, he’d respond to you. He dealt with the anguish in one of three ways. And he’d usually do them in excess: he’d either drink himself to insanity, go to the club, find a female, and fuck her till he was out of energy, or he’d make life horrible for the unfortunate people who crossed his way.
He went to check on the footsteps coming from the hallway while he wallowed in the anguish of that encounter. He approached the door, peered outside, and noticed a nurse approaching. He let out a sigh after relaxing his fist. He returned to his bed and folded his arms, waiting for the nurse to arrive at that ward.
When the nurse saw his expression, she realized he had been awake all night watching Julie. She had sympathy for him. She recognized him as Mr. Benson Astor, Los Angeles’ most eligible bachelor. But seeing him stripped of all his fame and money and reduced to nothing more than a concerned parent softened her heart towards him, and she hoped she could do something to make him happy. Maybe if she had superhuman abilities and could heal Julie.
They recognized him in the hospital since it used to be his family’s hospital. The nurse, for example, was one of the few people who knew he had adopted Julie. He may have given some people an irresistible sum of money in order for them to stay quiet about it, but his secret was safe there
Benson kept a close eye on Julie as the nurse examined her. “She’s doing much better and should be home by midday,” the nurse said, smiling.
Benson smiled weakly as he blinked his eyes to clear his vision, a sigh of relief coming over him.
She didn’t pass away. Throughout the night, I kept an eye on her.
His grin broadened. He sneezed. He had been crying, which the nurse had noticed. She was touched when she noticed he had cried.
Rich individuals always appeared stylish and confident, especially on television, so you’d never guess they had difficulties that could make them weep like babies, and sad like the rest of us. In truth, we only believe they are living the lives of our dreams, but the reality is they may be suffering much more than we are, and we let money and assets obscure our vision, blinding us to the plain human who still feels and experiences what we do behind the glitz. The truth is that when we rise higher, as in make more money, our demands and issues rise with it, thus up in the sky and down on the ground aren’t really that different.
“You love her so much,” the nurse observed Julie. “I can tell,” she said with a smile as she walked away.
“Thank you,” he responded, his voice hoarse.
Alita arrived right on time, as promised, so Benson could go to work and she could stay with Julie until they were ready to return home.
Alita’s steps were deliberate and quiet, since she didn’t want to disturb anyone who was already in suffering. Benson was completely unaware that she was approaching. As she approached the open door, she stood beside it and leaned against the frame, watching Benson stare at Julie in the same way she had left him the day before. She couldn’t be upset at him anymore at that point.
“It may all be a ruse, but maybe he wasn’t such an awful person,” she whispered. As she leaned against the doorframe and walked to him, she wondered whether she had exaggerated too much. She actually didn’t have a say in how he choose to live his life.
He was so preoccupied with Julie’s safety that she had to tap him on the shoulder to let him know she had arrived.
She teased, “Hey, sleepyhead.” “You’ve been sitting here all night long because you care about her,” she remarked as she tossed her bag to the ground next to the bed.
Benson raised his face to her before returning his gaze to Julie. “Look,” he said, clearing his throat. He sounded exhausted and looked fatigued, but he insisted on clearing his name. It was worth it, even if he drawled most of what he said. “I know how it felt yesterday, but if I had seen the first text, I would have been her the next minute. Yes, you saw everything that I wish you hadn’t seen, but you could have come to the office and not met me there because I was literally on my way out to get a drink when I saw her come into my office, and I had to wait to hear why she was back after reporting for her corporation,” he sighed and inhaled deeply. “You could have met me at a party or somewhere else and concluded that I was irresponsible and unfit to be a father, or that I wasn’t responding because I didn’t care, but I do. You have to believe that. I appreciate you looking after her for me. I’m not sure what I would have done if it hadn’t been for you,” he said, squinting his eye and lifting his gaze to her. “You look after her, and I can tell you care about her because of the way you dress her and comb her hair, and feed and play with her. Thank you for being such a kind person. Thank you for being there when I couldn’t,” he said, turning away.
“It’s all right, Mr. Astor,” she muttered grumpily in her head before speaking his name. Her eyes glittered as she said, “You’ve very well paid for your sin by being here with her all night.” “Now leave,” she commanded with her hands, “before we change our minds and hold you here for the rest of the day.”
Her eyes became larger as she noticed the bulge in Benson’s groin as he stood up. She averted her gaze almost instantly. She wanted to tell him he was on display for all to see, but it would be strange, and she didn’t want him to know she had seen it, so she kept her mouth shut, humming to herself.