The Alpha Can’t Sense His Mate

CALLA’S POV

I felt his eyes on me – Zadok’s.

Or should I say, Alpha Zadok’s? I couldn’t be distracted by him though. I didn’t have time to think about how his hands fit so perfectly around mine, or how much I wanted to return his gaze that had been on me all this while.

“I know you are tired, love.” Cole’s voice brought goosebumps in my arms. “Make it snappy and you’ll be off to rest.”

Since when did I hate his guts this much? My eyes found the bloodied men placed before me. The men I was supposed to kill for Cole’s amusement.

Sparing them wasn’t an option. I knew that from my three years of experience with Cole. If there was even the slightest chance of me trying to change his mind – it was thrown out of the window by the appearance of the guests.

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“Channel that power you spoke about earlier,” Scarlett whispered to my hearing. “You did it once. Twice’s the charm.”

I didn’t know if that was true. Because as I beheld the men, beaten out of recognition, I just couldn’t do it. I couldn’t find it in my mind to kill them in such a gruesome way when they had done nothing to me.

Of course, I knew they were not innocent in their ways, but I didn’t think it should be my job to finish them off.

“Just do it, Calla. They don’t deserve your mercy. These men deserve death. You would only be doing them a favour.” Cole said and a hiccup left my lips.

He noticed my hesitation to do it. I wondered what else he noticed.

“Okay..” I muttered and closed my eyes.

If I was going to commit this sin, I might as well do it with my eyes closed. Perhaps if I didn’t see them, I wouldn’t feel the discomfort and guilt for taking a breath out of their body.

I was wrong. Closing my eyes proved to be a bad idea because I ended up seeing him. Zadok – staring at me with his mesmerizing brown eyes. His eyes evoked something in me. It felt so familiar. Too familiar even.

My eyes fell open and I found him with ease – his brown orbs locked on me like a most priced possession. What was it with him?

“What happened?” Came the concerned voice of Scar,

“I can’t…” That was all I managed to say.

“Try again.” She urged, and I let my eyes find Cole’s. His jaws were tightened and he looked anything but pleased.

A paralysing chill went down my spine. “Shall we try that again, love?” He said, with a smile that intimidated me.

I nodded my head, unable to speak. I felt many eyes on me – the members of the BloodHound Pack. I couldn’t find it in me to look at the expression on their faces. They probably thought I was too chicken to perform.

I was an embarrassment and it was normal for Cole to feel upset. Failing in Cole’s eyes was redeemable, but I learned that failing in the sight of his guests might as well be unforgivable.

Cole treasured his face. He lived up to high expectations and prided himself in doing the extraordinary, making him well-known and formidable. Being his bride was a cross I had to carry – living up to his expectations, his pack’s expectations and the entire werewolf community.

The exact reason why he introduced me as the first Hybrid when he knew so well that I hadn’t gotten my wolf. So far, I understood I was a witch who could cast spells and do unimaginable things, but I had yet to find my wolf.

And for some reason, Cole remained hellbent on helping me ‘recover’ my wolf. How can one recover what they don’t have? I’ve asked Scar and people who are said to have known me before I tragically lost my memories, and every one of them told the same story.

I was a hybrid, Half wolf and Half witch. I just needed to find my wolf and it will be fine. I lost the strength to investigate any more about my identity and hoped that someday, as they have said, I would find my wolf.

However, I was content with being a witch. I was having a hard time relearning things I was said to be proficient in before and it took a toll on me. I wondered how it would be if I recovered my wolf too.

I’ll probably die from the training that would be imposed on me by Cole. I cringed at the thought and Cole’s impatient voice reached my hearings.

“Are you going to keep us waiting?” He gritted.

I didn’t reply. There was no use. I looked at the men and decided to do it despite every part of me that kicked against it. I tried to do it again, against my better judgment and nothing happened.

I tried again, and the results were the same.

Every time I opened my eyes after attempting to turn them into stone and saw them slumped and alive, I grew frustrated.

“Calm down, Calla.” Scar said but I was far too gone to be calm.

Why couldn’t I do it? Why can’t I do this right and end their suffering? Why?! I thought frustratedly.

“Because you are not a killer.” A voice said in my thoughts and I stilled in shock.

What was that?

I might have spent a lot of time in my head because Cole immediately spoke, sounding pissed and yet diplomatic about it.

“Calla.” He said, “We have guests.” He reminded me, and that did it.

“I can’t do it,” I said, meeting his eyes. “I am not a killer, Cole. I can do anything else, but not to kill.”

“What?”

“I apologize to you all.” My eyes found their way to my guests. “But I cannot do this.” My tone was resolute and I meant every single word.

Scar regarded me with a look that suggested I might have been stupid to do that. But I didn’t care. My head was banging with a headache, my body felt weak and I could still feel Zadok’s eyes on me.

I needed to leave. I had to go before I lost it in here.

“I think I might have stretched my mate past the limit,” Cole said to the guests and turned to me with a fake smile. “I’m sorry my love, I shouldn’t make you stain your hands with their dirty blood.” He said and turned towards the prisoners. “I will take care of them myself. Scar, please take my mate to her chambers. I will join you in a few.”

I opened my mouth to protest against killing the men but was led away by Scar, while I fought the urge to look back at the one whose eyes had never left me.