BAIDER (ENGLISH VERSION)

ANMELA’S POV

I ran quickly, going back to the room. I was sobbing as I put all my belongings in my bag. I was using the back of my hand to remove the tears, but whatever I did, it kept flowing.

I was so sure about Laurent, but why could he not do the same thing to me? So what am I to him? Just a f*ck buddy? I thought he loved me, but what I heard was enough for me to stop pursuing him.

I want to move on and go away.  Go far away from him and from the heartache he was causing me. I gave up

I left that house, and quickly packed my things in my apartment. My tears never ended. I totally thought he was a good person.

I just thought!

I left my phone in the apartment so that he would not find me even if it was possible because I was going home with my mother.

I called Ardent and Alem and told them that I was going to our province to smell some fresh air and I also made sure that they were not going to Laurent where I was.

Bye, Laurent…

********

It has been a week since I have been here in our province, to my place where I was born.

I was glad he could not follow me here, but I was also sad that he was not here. My mind was messed up, but the only person occupying it was Laurent.

I watched the stars. I used my index finger to trace the twinkling stars in the dark sky. Even in this dim beautiful view, the only thing that I was minding was him.

What happened to him? What is he doing? Is he okay? Is he eating well? Is he happy?

All of those were just stuck in my mind. If anything good happened in my life it was when I met him but sadly, the destiny given to me was really cruel, destiny showed me life was not just reaching your dream. It was all about when that dream belonged to your hand, if not… whatever or how tight your hold was, it would slip.

I love him, but he does not love me.

My thoughts made my tears dripped. In the past days, I was not getting tired of crying. This was the only constant companion I had since I left Laurent. My chest was brutally aching, stabbing, stinging-that was not stopping day by day, it worsened instead.

I looked at the height of the mansion he had built near our house, he said it was our house. Heartachingly, it would not going to happen anymore. I would not live with him with our child, happily married couple, everything came into vain.

I was just sitting on the hammock when suddenly something spun inside my belly. I ran to the lawn and blew out the content of my stomach. I felt like all of the food that I have eaten would burst out due to the severity of the vomiting.

I rubbed my forehead, I touched the cold sweat condensed to it.

This is what I am saying. That guy left a mark on me that wherever I go, I am his. It did not make me sad either.

A stretch on my lips grew as I caressed my stomach. There was a spreading joy in my heart. Somehow he left a memory that would forever be remembered by me.

“Hi, Baby.” I was smiling, but the liquid in my eyes was dripping. I forgot about how painful my chest was.

Would you be happy, Laurent, if you knew you are a daddy now?

I cried with joy as I held my stomach. Tonight was the happiest day of my life, excluding the day I met Laurent and I was with his side.

“Laurenz.” I whispered as I held my belly in caressing circular motion. I had no idea why I thought that he was a boy. I was so sure that I was pregnant because it was obvious, I felt the overfatigue and dizziness sometimes, not that severe.

“Laurenz Anm Baider, that’s your name, Son.” His name was soothing to my heart.

How would an unhappy woman suddenly become glad from the moment she knew that she had a baby? The power of love.

I thought that I would be pregnant the first time we made love-I knew it was possible because I was a nurse. I was aware of what would happen next, especially that he was not using any protection.

25 millions of sperms or more are needed before the egg cells reach and all of them will die and only one will survive for them to unite. What we did was he repeatedly put sperm cells in me. I was just happy to have those memories back in my mind.

“Our memories would store in my mind and I would never be tired of repeating it every time I am down. I hope you don’t come back because surely, it will be difficult for me to leave you again,” I whispered as if he was here, holding me.

I swayed the hammock, I was sitting on it while my feet were on the lawn, pushing my body to move back and forth. I was staring at the sky with the twinkling stars while hearing the crickets everywhere. When I got sleepy, I immediately walked towards the inside of the house and took my rest.

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When I opened my eyes, the sun rays hit my face. I blinked two times as I realized that I was in a familiar room, but definitely not my room!

I moved around, I almost jumped as the surprise reaction was written on my face.

Laurent is here! Gosh!

He was sitting on the sofa. I recognized that I was in the mansion, his planned house for us. I was sure of that because I have been here once. I just peeped to see what it looked like.

“Laurent…” I said that with almost an air, a low voice.

Did he come back for us to live in our mansion? No, I was dreaming again. There was no us.